Scribble Face For Sale!

I've got a brand new Scibble Face, so I'm getting rid of the old battered one if anyone wants it - very cheap, it's a bit worn around the edges but it's still good for a few years  ....." What on earth is she on about now?" is that what you're saying? My Scribble Face is what my dad, always rather endearingly, refers to as my cross face - like the sort of face the stick people have in children's pictures when they're angry. Unfortunately, the other people I know just refer to this expression when I wear it as "THE FACE ........... AGAIN!"


Some of us are unfortunately born with scribble faces - not because we are miserable buggers all the time, but because we just can't find much around us to make our scribbled mouths straight, let alone become full blown smilies!  With me, this "condition" is becoming more severe the older I  get , despite the fact that I am doing so much more work on myself to reduce my Victor Meldrewness! You see, I think the root cause of my problem, is that I don't like people very much! Well, no that's unfair, it's not that I don't like ALL people, it's just MOST people. If I've lost some readers already - then goodbye! For those who are staying on for more - thank you ...I'm starting to like you already.

I've always been quite outspoken with my opinion of the people around me. Growing up, it wasn't too bad, because I was indulged quite a bit by my dad who liked my strength of character. But I've always found it strange  how that same characteristic that my dad called "strength " has ,since I left the love of  his house, often be referred to as "aggression !" Perception is a funny thing isn't it? As an adult , my opinions have been less well received and have sometimes  been the cause of difficulties for me , but speaking up for what I think  is right and fair has always been important to me and if that makes me unpopular then so be it. I'm not talking about politics or economic issues (leave that for another blog) I'm just talking about everyday little things , behaviour and the way people  interact with each other and that's what I want to talk about this week.

I'm not sure if it's because I did a lot of team sports like hockey and netball growing up, but I've always had this impression of life that we're all in it together somehow. That I'm not just experiencing life as an "individual" in isolation  but that I must also  OBSERVE how my life impacts other people and how other people impact mine . As a result of this , I have found myself seeing life, or  attempting  to, from as many different perspectives as I can - trying to see what it feels like to walk in the shoes of others if you like.
But , sadly the reason I find my expression rarely changes, is because the vast majority of people " out there" don't  share this view point . To make matters worse, there are many people who chose to live in a way that is so completely irritating to me that I had to speak up about it.

Our behaviour says so much about us, even without us saying a word. The way we behave towards those we know, those we don't know, every interaction has an impact. It leaves a lasting impression.
It is so powerful it can create a heaven or a hell right here on Earth; it can make us blissfully happy or mournfully sad. Our behaviour can make people want to move mountains for us or turn their backs on us forever.

Just to watch people interacting with each other, even in a social setting - its incredible how much bad behaviour you can spot! In any social gathering, it is usually quite easy within an hour or so, to establish who the Controllers, Selfish and Rude ones are. The Controllers will talk the loudest and talk over everybody else. They will spend the entire time telling you how wonderful and successful they are, at everything they do, and how you are not .They will constantly tell you that you're wrong and then basically say exactly what you've just said in their own words! The Selfish ones, will talk about their own story all the time .They'll ignore your questions and your answers, because they only hear their own voice and when they're not talking, don't be fooled -- they're only listening to their own thoughts anyway!  And the best ones have to be the Rude ones. Not only do they not listen to the conversation, the rude ones will not even be aware that there are in fact other humans in the room at all and they still think they're great!
Those of you who have ever been the ones who never got a word out , or felt undermined in  any way , or just been  upset by others will understand exactly  what I am talking about . Those of you who may be guilty of perhaps a little selfishness or rudeness may tell me to stop being so analytical and relax! Where do you fit in?

Anyone  who know me , will no doubt say " well Surjit you have a pretty loud voice yourself " and I do , but I am also happy to be told when I'm wrong . Remember, I did say my rather passionate nature is often misquoted as aggressiveness! However, my reason for writing this blog is not just to have a rant, but to say that if we were all a little more considerate of the impact of our behaviour on those around us surely everyone would benefit. Arrogance, selfishness , controlling others to make ourselves feel good are  surely  all character FLAWS and therefore are not things to aspire to . And the worst extravagance of all must be to take advantage of the love, kindness and compassion of another. For that crime, there can be no forgiveness in my book.

And these are the things that give me a Scribble Face.

But I did receive something recently that allowed me to relax the muscles in my face, for a change. It was an email entitled - Random Acts Of Kindness. The message was simply to give the reader examples of acts of kindness that they could do for total strangers, without the receivers knowing who had carried them out. It included things like; paying the toll for the car behind you at a toll bridge, putting money into parking meter for someone just before it ran out or simply giving way to a car in a traffic jam. Looking down the list , I decided that I would try and do some of these on a regular basis, not  because I want to go to heaven or  think I'm a goody goody , but because it'll just make other people , people I don't even know feel a bit  happier. That's what life is all about. It's about being good to those around us, not just for personal gain or to step on so you can get to the next "rung up." It's a team sport, and too many of us expend too much energy competing against the same side.

I love my new Scribble Face, it's really grumpy looking this one! Actually, those of you brave enough to come closer will know that behind the scribble I'm not that bad really, some days I can even be quite nice. So please don't be afraid I don't bite - well, not unless you really annoy me!!!